Faux painting...the Most Dangerous Job On Earth?

Saturday, February 13, 2010

I think when most people think of the world's most dangerous jobs they instantly think of the classics: arctic crab fishing, international spy, industrial logger, professional killer, return desk clerk at Macy's after Christmas....you know, the usual. But did you know that the faux finishing industry is one of the most challenging and fraught with peril? Its not all soft sponges and moist cheesecloth.
I've been bitten in the lip by a moody little Shih-tzu named Princess. I've narrowly escaped construction workers battling it out with rebar over a woman. There have been some serious coffee spills in the morning....dangerously hot coffee! We've witnessed some of the most horrific “plumbers crack” episodes from our fellow contractors. And speaking of cracks, have you ever cracked open a can of paint that has “turned”? It's as though a vicious skunk demon is waiting to punch you in the nose.
Then there are the emasculating effects of your male friends ridiculing you for painting so many unicorns. I'm currently addressing that in therapy.
So next time you see your friendly neighborhood faux painter busily tea-staining your aunt's reading room walls, give him or her a Clint Eastwood style nod of respect. They deserve it.

1 comment:

  1. Sounds very dangerous, but someone has to do it. Nice arse by the way!